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How To Attract More Dates With Your Personality

Your personality is what sets you apart from everyone else in the world.

After years of careful molding and growth, you pride yourself on your better personality traits — your ambition, wit, and charm.

But when somebody points out your unfavorable traits like jealousy or a short-temper, you have a go-to response:

I am who I am.

As it turns out, personality isn’t as permanent as scientists once believed.

You might not be able to change your genetics or childhood, but you can always strive to become a better person with time.

Take a look at these seven personality development tips to keep moving forward.

Broaden Your Horizons & Keep an Open Mind

In a way, your comfort zone is your “safe space.”

And whether it’s that you enjoy comfort or fear the unknown — you stick to what you know. Like your culture, religion, hobbies, career path, and even your social circle.

Yet, there’s a whole world around just waiting for you to discover it. So it’s time to expose yourself to what you don’t know in life.

Here are a few ways that you can broaden your horizons and keep an open mind:

  • Attend social gatherings and talk to people you don’t know.
  • Try out new restaurants, parks, and hangouts locally and abroad.
  • Join a club or social group and make new friends.
  • Volunteer your time to help those who are struggling.
  • Try a new hobby or learn new skills.

Here’s the thing:

You don’t need to be well-traveled or have dozens of stamps on your passport to be “interesting” or broaden your horizons.

All it takes is some willingness to see there’s more to the world than your world.

Don’t Be So Hard On Yourself

It’s normal to have high expectations for yourself.

Maybe you want to graduate from college cum laude, buy a house by the time you turn 30, or even do something as simple as run a mile in eight minutes or less.

But when you come up short on your visions, you’re rightfully disappointed.

Remember this: 

You don’t learn from success.

You learn from failure.

So it’s essential to take your failures in stride and use your shortcomings to catapult you toward your future successes.  Take note of what went wrong and steps you can take to ensure success next time. Most importantly, learn to be okay with imperfections. It’s admirable to want to succeed, but try to go easy on yourself like you would other people.

Rome wasn’t built in a day, after all!

Develop the Ability to Forgive and Forget

You’ve likely felt the sting of scorn before, whether by an ex-lover, a former boss, or even a family member.

The pain is often unbearable.

But as much as you’re hurting and feel betrayed by someone you once trusted, holding a grudge against them is only doing more harm than good. The anger eats away at you and becomes part of your identity.

Forgive and forget.

Forgive those that hurt you and make peace with what happened to free your mind of the negativity that’s overtaken it. Learn from what happened, but don’t let it hold you back anymore!

Focus on the future.

Avoid Comparing Yourself to Others

Right now, there are over seven billion people in the world. And if you’re like a lot of us, you compare yourself to some of those other people.

You might see skinny women in magazines and feel envy. See the person dating your crush and ask why you weren’t good enough for them. Or maybe you desire to be like your role model.

Self-improvement is essential, but not if it costs you your individuality.

Comparing yourself to others will only fuel negative emotions — jealousy, envy, disgust, and anger.

Plus, you’re putting a value on your worth based on how you compare to others!

Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what makes you unique. Be who you really are instead of who you think society expects you to be.

People enjoy having friends and colleagues who are authentic.

Acknowledge Your Faults & Take Accountability

Nobody likes to take the blame for something that goes wrong or confess that they imperfect. It’s uncomfortable to admit they weren’t right about something they were confident about.

But it’s a sign of emotional maturity to admit your faults and take accountability.

It’s not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of strength.

When something goes wrong, take a look at the big picture. Ask yourself, “What role did I play in this, and could I have done anything differently”?

Be honest with yourself and everybody else around you. And most importantly, promise to do better and make up for the role you played in the situation.

Nobody is expecting you to be perfect. If anything, they’ll appreciate your transparency and self-awareness, two qualities that are hard to come by these days.

You’ll be somebody that others can trust!

Listen Twice as Much as You Speak

A good part of your personality will come down to your social life and how you interact with other people.

Talk too much? It looks like you don’t care about what others think or feel.

Talk too little? You come off as dull or uninteresting.

Finding the middle-ground between the two is tricky and, honestly, a skill that takes some time to craft.

Listening is always better and, in particular, active listening.

Here are some things you can do today to improve your relationships through this skill:

  • Nod, smile, and laugh!
  • Ask questions about what others have said.
  • Paraphrase what somebody else said.
  • Keep good eye contact and excellent posture.

As you work on your listening skills, you’ll notice a few changes in your social relationships. People will see you as open, thoughtful, and positive.

Learn to See the Best in Every Situation

Nothing in life will ever go exactly according to plan. Instead of trying to make things go perfectly every time, stop seeing the forest for the trees.

Focus on the entire picture.

Try your best to see the good in every situation.

For example, you applied for a job and didn’t get the position. But you now have some interview experience under your belt and feel confident in your abilities.

People love being around positive and optimistic individuals.

Help others see the good in every situation, no matter how small, and begin spreading infectious positivity to those in your circle.

You’ll notice it rubs off on your friends and that your social circle is growing.

Conclusion

Personality development will require you to look deep within yourself.

You’ll have to identify which current traits you’d like to mold or the new characteristics you’d like to adopt. And also decide the pieces of yourself you genuinely love.

It takes time and effort.

But as long as you have your sights set on becoming a better person, you’ll be well on your way to being the person that others love to be around!

Adam Marshall is a freelance writer who specializes in all things apartment organization, real estate, and college advice. He currently works with Quarry Trail to help them with their online marketing.

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