4 Things to Consider When Moving in With Your Significant Other

Preparing to move in with your partner is an exciting time.

From picking out a place to collaborating on design, there’s lots to look forward to when you’re leasing in love. But before you embark on this next step with your beau, be sure to consider these four tips.

The Space

Deciding where you want to live is one of the most important decisions you’ll make when moving in with your S.O. If each person has their own space they’re comfortable in, is one person willing to leave it to move into the other’s digs? If so, you’ll want to think about how you can make the space feel like home for the both of you. Whether that’s switching up the design, adding in separate home workspaces, or reconfiguring the closet.
If neither of you are set on staying in your current setup, you’ll get the exciting opportunity to look for something new! Before you begin browsing rental listings or real estate platforms, you’ll want to start by nailing down your wishlist.

Your Wishlist

Even if you and your partner seem to agree on absolutely everything, chances are, you have your own opinions and preferences on your individual living situations. Some couples swear by having their own bathrooms while others must have separate closets to keep their sanity. Before you begin your house or apartment hunt, discuss your wishlist for your new space.

To keep things realistic, try to separate your list into “must-haves” and “nice to haves.” Here’s a sample wishlist to get the ball rolling:

Must-haves:

  • Outdoor space
  • Nice kitchen (plenty of space for two cooks!)
  • Separate home workspaces
  • Storage
  • Natural light

Nice to haves:

  • Two bathrooms
  • Guest room
  • Walk-in closet

Once the two of you have come to an agreement with your wishlist, it will be much easier to narrow down your house hunt!

Finances

Figuring out finances is probably the most important aspect of the pre-move-in process, but it’s also one of the most complex pieces to figure out. Ideally, you want to find a balance where both partners feel comfortable, and neither feels like they’re pulling too much weight than the other.

If you’re renting a space, discuss whether or not you’ll split rent or utilities right down the middle, or if you can (comfortably) be flexible with these housing-related expenses. What’s most important here is making sure that you’re being honest with one another. Reluctantly taking on more of the expenses may cause resentment later on down the road, or vice versa, so make sure the two of you are speaking your truth!

If you plan to buy a house together, finances become a bit more complicated. You’ll likely need to apply for a mortgage, which is a major commitment to agree to, but it’s also a major financial milestone that could open up a lot of opportunities. As you discuss your current financial situation, you’ll also want to think ahead. If you want to remodel your kitchen once you’ve earned some equity, would you consider a VA cash out refinance or a standard HELOC?

Considering these questions and possibilities now will make it easier to finalize decisions later on down the road.

Household Responsibilities

Who does the dishes? Who takes out the trash? Does one person have a preference over the other, will you share these chores evenly, will you hire a cleaning service once a month? Deciding how to handle household responsibilities is a major point of contention for housemates and soulmates alike, so before you make the move, consider approaching the topic before things get messy.

Where You’re At In Your Relationship

There’s no question that moving in with your S.O. is a big step to take in your relationship, so it should be treated as such! While there’s no roadmap for when you should or shouldn’t share a space with someone you love, taking the time to think through these tips will certainly point you in the right direction.

Bottom line: remember that this can be a really fun and formative time for yourself and your partner, so between discussing budgets and boundaries, don’t forget to embrace the experience. Have you ever moved in with a partner? Share your tips, tricks, and words to the wise in the comment section below!

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