5 Qualities Most People Look for When Dating

If you’ve been single for a while, you may be starting to wonder why. While being single can be freeing, many people crave the companionship at the end of the day. How can you make your dating profile look more desirable? Your latest selfie probably won’t do the trick, but these five things are considered a must to many on the lookout for a potential partner.

Communication

Communication is a two-way street. Some people just want to talk and struggle with listening while others may have no interest in continuing the conversation. You can’t get to know someone if you can’t communicate. Unless it’s a blind date, this is something you can already scope out. Whether it’s online or in person, people want to be able to have meaningful conversations. No one wants to just have generic small-talk all the time.

You want to be able to openly talk to your loved one. When you are in a new relationship you have your guarded emotional walls up. When you share something that is vulnerable and it’s met with respect and understanding you gain confidence. That makes the wall come down a little bit more. When you are told something new in a relationship you should also listen, try to understand, and keep empathy at hand. That builds trust. When you repeat this over and over you build a strong bond.

Confidence

People always say that you can’t love someone else until you love yourself. While the validity of this is debatable, it’s difficult to love someone who doesn’t see their own worth. Deflecting compliments will make a partner uncomfortable. What can they say if you don’t even accept their praise? It’s exhausting to be with someone who doesn’t love themselves and while building people up is nice, you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.

Owning A Car

A car is considered a basic sign of adult independence. An old used car is considered fine to most people, but not having a car at all is often seen as a sign of laziness depending on where you live. This may not be the case if you have a city with amazing public transit. People are looking for a partner who is there equal, not someone that they feel they need to parent. While there are some legitimate reasons that some people can’t drive, this isn’t about judging someone’s character based on a specific model of the car they drive. Owning a car can open opportunities to independence. An auto loan can help you get to your dates, school, work, and go from someone dating around to showing you are ready for independence and adult relationships.

Appearance

Some people may think this sounds shallow, but it isn’t that in depth for many people. Most people just want to see that you put some amount of effort into how you look. Don’t go meet someone looking like you just rolled out of bed and expect them to be attracted to you. Be yourself, but a little effort goes a long way. You get what you give so don’t expect an extremely attractive date to come along if you aren’t practicing proper hygiene.

Make sure that you are participating in basic hygiene routines. Brush your teeth, use mouthwash, and make sure you find a proper deodorant for your body odor. Finding the right hair routine can do wonders. Make sure your clothing isn’t wrinkled. If you don’t want to go through ironing you can spray water and put it in the dryer for ten minutes. It’s less about what you wear or changing your appearance, and more about putting effort and being proud of yourself.

A Job

Most people won’t consider dating someone that is unemployed. Especially with a new relationship, you don’t want to have to be financially supporting each other. It puts a lot of strain on the relationship and can lead to resentment pretty quickly. Maybe temporarily step off the market if you become unemployed unless there’s a reason such as disability where you still have a steady and reliable income.

This may not be a deal breaker for everyone. There are definitely reasons why someone isn’t working. You may be in school, health, taking care of children. Finances aren’t the reason why someone should or shouldn’t date someone else. However, people are usually looking for someone with drive that wants to be fulfilled. If you don’t have a job, but are working on something dear to you then this shouldn’t be an issue.

Sometimes you’re your own worst enemy when it comes to finding a date. Most people are looking for these five things before they’re willing to consider going on a date, so ensure your ducks are in a row or you’re likely to continue striking out.

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