Nothing is more frustrating than a man who likes you but won’t commit to you. Not only is his behavior contradicting his words, but you’re not clear on what he means when he says he’s not ready for commitment.
It’s no secret that men and women speak two different languages. To most women’s frustration when a guy says one thing he often does another making it even harder to translate his words. No behavior is more common than a guy who dates you for a few weeks but insists he’s not ready for a relationship. This statement might sound straightforward but it actually means a few different things.
If the guy you’re dating tells you that he isn’t ready for commitment there is a missing phrase and its because…
You’re not “The One.”
It might be a blow to the ego but it’s important to understand that men know, even faster than women, when the person they’re seeing is someone they can fall in love with. Maybe not exactly his future wife but studies have shown that men develop feelings of love faster than women. While it might take a woman a few weeks, it can literally take men just a few dates to build a deep infatuation. This is so common that if a guy hasn’t built a strong attachment to you within a few weeks he’s unlikely to commit to a relationship.
When the man you’ve been dating for longer than a month says that he’s not ready for a relationship he means with you. He hasn’t developed those deep bonding feelings he’s used to so he assumes that you’re just not the one for him. He likes you as much as he shows you he does but not enough to commit.
I want to be with someone else.
Unlike women, men don’t stop dating other people just because a new relationship begins to develop. There are situations in which a man is pursuing a woman who isn’t that into him. While he would rather be in a relationship with her he finds himself meeting you.
You can blame the ego again for making this man believe that he has a chance with the elusive woman he’s been chasing. So he bides time with you by saying he isn’t ready for a relationship. If it turns out that this woman will never give in at least this man has found a suitable back up, you, who he enjoys spending time with.
It’s not the right time.
Finding love has a lot to do with timing. When a man says its not the right time for him to be in a relationship, believe him. When a man is ready to settle down he usually does, which is why a sworn bachelor can find himself single one day and married the next.
You might be afraid that with time in the way your relationship is over but it’s not. A man who isn’t ready because of timing is the most honest of them all. He knows himself and he understands where he wants to be in life. If a man forces himself to be with a woman when he knows the timing isn’t right they could both end up miserable, even when they love each other.
The secret to winning a man over who just isn’t “ready” for a relationship is to rely on the following.
First, don’t be afraid to move on. Our ego tells us that a man we can’t have is the one we should want but it’s not true. There is a partner for everyone, a lid for every pot. Don’t waste a moment of your time trying to convince a man of your value. Not only will that behavior lower your value in his eyes, it also doesn’t work.
Next, keep dating other people. It’s great when you have chemistry with a guy but if he isn’t ready for a relationship forcing him into one just seems needy. If a man is hung up on another woman the thought of losing you is just enough to make him realize what’s right in front of him.
Lastly, be patient but wait apart. The man who is meant for you will be yours but in the meantime live your life. It might be hard to leave a relationship when you know in your heart you’re with the right person but it’s smart.
Give the man you care about space to accomplish his goals and be the man he wants to be. If you can support him as a friend do so. Eventually he’ll find his way and he’ll appreciate you giving him the space to follow his dreams.