I know you want to enjoy dating -so what are you waiting for?
For most single men and women, it isn’t exactly that they’re waiting for something as much as it is that they’re afraid of something. Maybe the real question is, “What are you afraid of?”
There are goals that you want to achieve in your love life and possibly your life in general yet you’re putting them off. You’re really good at talking yourself out of doing what you know will make you happy. Why is that? I know and you know that you want to be in love. A relationship would be so amazing right now.
Not only do you want it, it’s your right to have it. That probably isn’t an idea that you’ve come to fully accept but it’s the facts. You’ll never enjoy dating unless you believe that you’ll find love at the end of your search. But you can’t seem to be productive in your search… hmm I wonder why?
You’re probably wondering the same thing, “Why is dating so difficult and why is love so hard to find?” These questions might seem innocent enough but they’re just a mask for a deeper issue. Many singles put roadblocks in their path when it comes to dating, that’s why it’s so difficult.
They make statements like:
- I’ll date when I lose a few more pounds.
- I’ll date when I get a new job.
- I’ll start dating after I relocate or get settled in a new city.
- I’ll date once I save more money or feel financially stable.
- I’ll date when I have more time.
Do any of these excuses sound familiar?
There is nothing wrong with having priorities when it comes to dating but many times we’re just making excuses because we’re afraid. Instead of approaching dating like, ‘I got this’, you tell yourself I can’t date because…
Phrases like dating is a crapshoot, you have to kiss a lot of frogs or there are plenty of fish in the sea make us believe that the process of finding “the one” should suck. Not true.
Dating is no different than job hunting. Just because you’ve had a few jobs or several interviews, it doesn’t mean you’re on a miserable path to your ultimate career. With each new job or interview, you should be that much optimistic that you’ll land your dream job. Just because you haven’t found your dream job doesn’t mean you stop working.
Just because you aren’t ready to spend the rest of your life with every potential date you meet, doesn’t mean you’re bad at dating or that the process is shitty.
If you approach dating like job-hunting, from the perspective that you want to be really successful, you’re already making progress.
Just like job hunting, you want a position that is going to meet your needs. You want a job where you can utilize your skills and most of all, be an asset to the company. Right?
If you attack finding great dates as you would seek potential job prospects, you need to be prepared for what you find right? That means your résumé needs to be stellar, and competitive. You need to have experience and most of all you need to know why you’re right for the job and the job is right for you.
But you need to put yourself in the game by being better today than your were yesterday.
That includes dropping the excuses you’ve been making not to date. That means putting more effort into being that whole and complete person because if you don’t, you’ll never feel good enough.
I can’t stress how important it is that we live in reality. We must admit to our mess and live in honesty. If you’re fat, say your fat. If you’re broke say you’re broke, if you’re not sexy, say “I’m not sexy”.
Stop living in fear that someone will call you the same things that you call yourself.
Stop being afraid that you’re something so terrible no one will want you otherwise. Stop being afraid of the truth that you’ve wanted to change but haven’t found the courage. Admit to what is your reality then commit to changing it. The only reason you’re not dating successfully is that you aren’t sure how to do it.
Dating successfully isn’t magic. The first step is being prepared to meet who you want to meet. Act ready. Leave your house everyday with the expectation that the right person for you is on your doorstep. You have to stop being afraid for the love you claim to want. The more excuses that you make for why you can’t be successful in dating the longer it will take to actually find lasting love.
Do you have that kind of time? Wouldn’t it be easier to find solutions?
Life is full of what ifs. There isn’t an answer to what lies ahead. The only way to erase your fear is to do the thing that scares you. First, determine that you will succeed then learn the necessary information to be a success.
If you’re willing to stop waiting and start dating, you will become more comfortable in the dating world and you will eventually get it right. The key, however, is to start.
I hope this was helpful.