As important as flirting is to meeting potential dates most singles don’t know how to flirt effectively.
I consider flirting speaking with a smile, building good rapport and creating a connection. It can be done with anyone. It doesn’t mean that you have sexual intentions or that you’re interested in dating the person you’re speaking with; it’s just a pleasant exchange.
Single men and women place too much emphasis on flirting.
Sometimes we ward against it because we’re not interested in the person initiating the flirting and we don’t know how to effectively let them down.
You have to ask yourself, ‘Do I know what flirting is?’ ‘Am I good at flirting?’
One way that you can tell if you’re good at flirting is if the person you’re speaking with is smiling and making eye contact.
The moment someone turns their body away from you, or looks down and away, you’re not flirting successfully.
So how do you flirt successfully without coming across as awkward or a creeper? You also don’t want to seem insecure, needy or aggressive, so what should you do?
First, you should understand that the goal of flirting is to get someone to like you. You want the person that you’re speaking with to have positive feelings when they speak to you, so that they’ll want to continue speaking to you.
Start with a smile.
The first words you utter should be said with a smile followed by eye contact. Whether it’s a formal introduction or a casual hello, make sure you look your potential date in the eyes.
Now I know not everyone is funny or quick-witted but find something to laugh about. If you can start the conversation with humor, you will lower your potential dates’ guard.
Give them a compliment.
It’s important to make the other person feel good. That shows that you’re confident. Saying something nice, and hopefully genuine, is a great way to build rapport. I support using adjectives like fantastic, phenomenal, amazing, or incredible.
Offer to help.
Doing for others is great way to create chemistry. Whether you’re guiding them to the produce section at the grocery store, offering to buy a drink or hold the door, if you can find a way to be of service you will seem attractive.
The only reason your flirting isn’t always welcomed is because you seem like you want something, mostly sex but it could also be attention. Anytime you come across as wanting anything, the interaction will be shut down.
So the next time you have the opportunity to flirt, do it. Smile, share a joke and give a compliment. Let a good-looking stranger take your spot in line and you might find them asking you out.