If you’re single and you want to go on more dates with amazing people it’s far easier to make that happen when you’re the one doing the asking. If you’re a single woman, it’s easier to navigate the dating world when you put yourself in the driver’s seat. Many women wonder if they should be asking men on dates, and the answer is yes.
The fear of doing the asking is this: how do you know that a man is really interested if you are the one who asks him out? Another fear is if you will be expected to pay for the date. A third fear is being used, or played by a guy who will say yes to anyone. Well guess what ladies? Men have the exact same fear and they ask women out anyway. Except you might have noticed that men are doing the asking less and less, because it’s become more painful than ever to face rejection. So if you want to start dating great men, you have to start finding them, vetting them and then asking them out.
SPEAK TO MORE MEN
Women have a really hard time relating to men. Even the women who claim to have more male friends than female friends often find it hard to relate to men that they don’t know. You have to speak to more men on a regular basis to really understand how to communicate with men. You have to start building rapport with men instead of being afraid of them. It’s easy to avoid the men that you don’t want to date but if you’re going to be comfortable asking men out, then you have to get comfortable just speaking with men in the first place.
- Don’t assume that the man wants something from you.
- Don’t assume that you don’t have the choice to end the conversation when you want to.
- Don’t assume that speaking to a man means that you’re hitting on him.
There are some really wonderful people in this world and some of them are men. If you are open-minded and can start a conversation with any man, then you’ll find it easier to approach the men that you like and ask them out.
VET ALL OF YOUR DATES
When you meet a guy either in person or online you should walk him through a vetting process before you agree to go out on a date with him. Relationships are co-created and it’s important to choose a man who is a partner from the very beginning. Its this small investment early on that will make dating easier in the long run. If you want to go out with someone who hasn’t asked, and you’ve vetted him then ask him out.
Don’t just ask out any guy that you think is attractive. Men want to know that they aren’t going to face immediate rejection, and when you show some interest it’s likely that he will ask you out first. But just in case he doesn’t it’s ok for you to ask him once he’s proven to be interested. Vetting your date could be as simple as asking to speak on the phone or asking him questions such as what he’s reading or where he’s traveled to lately. You don’t have to give him the third degree but you should establish a little trust before you ask him out.
TELL HIM DON’T ASK HIM
“I’m free for dinner, or a drink if you’d be up for it.” Just because you suggest a date doesn’t mean you have to plan a date. Just open the window and let the guy jump. If he takes you up on the offer great. If he doesn’t then he might be dating someone else. It doesn’t mean no, it only means not right now.
When it comes to asking a man on a date it has to be a part of a larger strategy. If you’re just dating for fun then there is nothing to lose. If you’re dating for a relationship then asking the men you like to go out with you is the best way to ensure that you’ll get what you want.