Why Men Love Bitches And They Do

why men love bitches
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Attraction Principle #56

When you treat him casually as though he’s a friend he’ll come your way. Because he wants things to be romantic, but he also wants to be the pursuer.

Have you ever heard the saying, “Nice girls finish last.” Well, neither had I until I read the book, ‘Why Men Love Bitches’.

Up until then, I had believed that I was considerate, giving and accommodating but in the words of Sherry Argov, I was too nice. The concept of being “too nice” in dating is one that has faced a lot of controversy over the years. It’s all semantics. When we claim that someone is nice, it doesn’t translate to kind or generous it often means they’re weak, and reserved.

 

It’s been my experience that women are “nice” in a different way then men.

 

We are nice because we feel bad when we’re not. In both cases the actions of the nice person are transactional. We give or do something in exchange for something else, often attention.

 

In fact, most women wish they didn’t have to feel so guilty all of the time just for standing up for themselves.

Most women wish that they could be more demanding and in fact they should. Why Men Love Bitches,’ is the book for women who can’t figure out why the men they date seem to leave them, or remain unavailable. As someone who has read a countless number of dating advice books, this one is one of my favorites. Largely because the principles are really gender specific.

 

Sorry dudes…

 

Yes, Sherry Argov is writing to women but she is explaining human principles that apply to everyone.

I like this book because it enforces something that I deeply believe, which is actions have reactions. Everything you do in dating either brings you closer to or further away from your partner. If you’re like me you weren’t blessed with the natural skills of inspiring commitment so the book lays out, in clear language, which actions turn men off.

 

Some of my favorite principles include:

 

#1 Anything a person chases in life runs away.

 #6 It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt.

#42 When you are always HAPPY; And he is always free to Go; He feels lucky.

 

I love this book because it’s also a hard lesson in setting boundaries.

No one has the power to make you feel happy, sad, fulfilled, depressed, or any other emotion that you don’t want to feel. YOU are in the driver’s seat of your feelings. It’s important that you don’t feel that every man you date is your last chance at love. He should be winning you over, not the other way around.

 

When you are anxious about where the relationship is going it’s because you’re living in a scarcity mindset. 

 

You’re experiencing a feeling that comes from a painful past experience and you’re showing low value behavior. This book gives you the tools to act like a confident person even though you might not feel confident at the time.

More importantly this book emphasis one truth that both single men and women forget.

YOU DON’T NEED THEM TO BE HAPPY.

Human beings have a want and need to love and express love. We grow as people when we’re able to express ourselves in a safe and balanced relationship. If you’re trying to express love and positive feelings but you’re met with disinterest and inconsistency, don’t try harder: bounce.

 

You don’t need to explain why, or give them a chance to explain themselves. When you start dating someone, take their behavior at face value because that’s how they’re taking yours. In fact, a man is judging everything you say and do as an indication of how much you value yourself.

 

What this book emphasizes, which I love, is that the attitude you have about yourself, as seen through your actions, is exactly the attitude a man will have towards you.

 

The rules that this book shares are about behaving in a high value way all of the time. It doesn’t translate into conservative or perfect behavior but it stresses the need to set boundaries. The beautiful thing about boundaries is that once you set your boundaries those willing to date within them will show up for you. You have to be patient and optimistic. When you recognize that you are a prize and you act like a prize the right men try to win you over.

 

This book reinforces the importance of putting your self-esteem above all else. Its a skill that can be taught and one that I suggest you learn. I own a copy, buy yours here; thedatingtruthbookclub.

 

I hope this was helpful.

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Miss Solomon

Miss Solomon

Founder at The Dating Truth
Dating expert. Marketing aficionado. Lover of people. Miss Solomon has a passion for writing about love, creating love strategies and mastering self- love. She's the founder of this site.
Miss Solomon

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6 thoughts on “Why Men Love Bitches And They Do

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  2. #56

    No. I don’t want to be romantic, “chase” a woman around, or be a pursuer…I don’t want to be bitch made thank you. I will tolerate small amounts of this, but an generally intolerant. Take that to mean what you will

  3. Thank you for telling women to wake up. I got out of a shitty relationship thanks to that attitude. It didn’t “end well” because I was a mess when I expressed myself and why I was leaving but whatever: my instincts were right. It was embarrassing because I was too emotional when I spoke but frankly who cares if you walk funny when you are going the right direction (dumped him)?
    He thought I was just “some girl” so I dipped. Then suddenly “wait we can talk about it”.
    The reason I stayed and got into it in the first place is because “the love of my life” had left me so I was desperate to fill the void and “anyone would do”.
    No, anyone does not do. I’m not in love with the 1st man anymore but he did set a standard. I know love and respect when I see it now and I know “the chase” when I see it too.

    Sometimes people lie to themselves because they are scared of being alone so anyone will do (it can go both ways). They know he doesn’t love them but they stick around and their self-respect dips.
    You CAN stop. I am back to being “me”. The happy, strong, and polite non-hateful me I was before I met any man…I’m lucky the desperate phase lasted a short while. I will never play with fire and let”loneliness” guide my relationship decisions.

    YOUR SELF-WORTH IS NOT DEPENDENT ON SOMEONE’S DESIRE TO BE WITH YOU.
    YOUR WORTH IS NOT DEPENDENT ON SOMEONE’S OPINION.

    After the lesson was learned:
    Rich guy tells me he can get any girl he wants and is mad I won’t kiss him (first date rule of mine). I heard him badmouth the waitress (I actually like her and tip her handsomely for being nice usually) so that’s an indicator.
    He starts getting grumpy and tells me there are prettier girls etc… Zero respect for me. I ignored him for about 4 days of him calling and told him he had bad intentions I knew it.
    He still calls; I never pick up and it’s been two weeks…

    Boundaries ladies, boundaries!
    Learn to get standards and never let anyone cross them.

    1. What an awesome comment, thank you! Props to you for learning the lesson of self-worth. We all suffer lapses in our self-esteem but it’s our responsibility to pick ourselves back up. Its not a bad thing to fall for the wrong guy, we have to learn the lessons. When we know better we need to do better. That is the message. Value yourself and others will value you too. Thank you for reading!

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