Why You Struggle To Get More Dates

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You’re single and you want to meet more people. Not just potential dates, but possibly the love of your life. You might even be looking for a meaningful, fulfilling relationship.

Unfortunately, it’s been awhile since you’ve met anyone who piqued your interest. Perhaps you’ve pursued a date here or there but it ended up being useless and unfruitful.

I’ve found that the secret to dating that no one ever shares, except me of course is attraction.

Attraction is the end all be all driving force of what brings you and your dream guy/girl together. But without desire, there can be NO attraction.

If you don’t want anything how are you going to be drawn to someone who has it or vice versa? Desire is what starts the engine. It’s the shot at the beginning of the race.

Desire is the beginning to being the most sought after single in your circle.

What does it mean to be desired?

Below is the Merriam Webster synonym discussion of what desire can mean.

Desire, wish, want, crave, covet mean to have a longing for. Desire stresses the strength of feeling and often implies strong intention or aim <desires to start a new life>. Wish sometimes implies a general or transient longing especially for the unattainable <wishes for permanent world peace>. Want specifically suggests a felt need or lack <wants to have a family>. Crave stresses the force of physical appetite or emotional need <craves sweets>. Covet implies strong envious desire <covets his rise to fame>

Do potential dates feel this way about you? Are you desirable?

Maybe you don’t know if you are or aren’t because for so long you’ve been telling yourself that you’re a “catch”. For the most part your friends agree yet you’re still waiting to be caught, so what’s the problem?

Desire is want. Do potential dates want you? If so, why?

Are you sexy?

Every man and woman on this planet is looking for: physical stimulation, chemistry and value. These are the crucial ingredients to building desire.

Can you flirt?

Can you be challenging and playful? A flirtatious behavior and unique personality will help to build want between you and potential dates.

Do you make others feel good?

Making potential dates feel good about themselves encourages desire. Mood elevation and affirmative speech create positive feelings that the person you’re speaking with will associate with you. This will make them want to be around you more often.

If you answered yes to each question, congratulations! You’re desirable! Dating for you is simply a matter of translating that desire to a sense of urgency. If you answered no to any or all the above questions then your biggest hurdle in dating is going to be becoming desirable. If people don’t want you they won’t want to date you.

You don’t have to rack your brain, trying to figure out what you’re doing wrong. If you aren’t desirable, it doesn’t mean that you’ll never get a date you might get lots of dates.

But desire is what makes dating exciting and fulfilling.

Thoughts?

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Miss Solomon

Founder at The Dating Truth
Dating and relationship expert. Lover of people. Relationship Coach and part-time stylist. Miss Solomon has a passion for writing about love, creating love strategies and mastering self- love.