The Dating Truth

“You can explore the universe looking for somebody who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and you will not find that person anywhere.” – Unknown

Whether or not it shows, I am constantly working on improving my talents as a writer, so I read a lot of blogs about blogging.

There are so many elements of the industry that I definitely need to work on. I find myself, when I’m not writing, reading about how to write/blog better. One key piece of advice, I recently read on blogtyrant.com is that the key to getting more comments on a post is by never answering “all” of the questions.

This I find incredibly hard to do.

As a person truly invested in helping single people date better, it’s hard to leave any steps out because the results may suffer. So to help me out, I promise that I will always try to give you all the answers if you, the reader, give me a little feed back about if the advice works or not.

That being said, I want to answer the biggest question most men and women have about dating: how do you find love?

The one thing that I know about dating is that it has a specific purpose. Eventually single men and women want to find love. But in answering that ageless question I have to offer the obvious answer, you look.

Now, we’ve all been told that love comes when you’re not looking and other such fairy tales but the truth is, you constantly have to look. The problem has been too many singles look for love in the wrong place, another person. That’s right, love isn’t found in someone else.

Not to sound like ‘Yesterday, I cried’ or that my soul has opened up, because it hasn’t but the dating truth (the truth according to me) is you find love within you and you recognize love within others.

Think about it, many of us have different ideas of love. Most of us can agree that love doesn’t physically hurt but outside of abuse, how can any of us truly know what love is? Have you defined love for yourself? Do you know what love is or are you waiting for someone else to show you?

If you don’t know what love is, you’re going to have a hell of a time finding it.

The problem with many singles and the reason I write a blog called The Dating Truth is because people are lying to themselves.

If you are lying to yourself and convincing yourself that you’re happy when you’re not, that you love yourself when you don’t- the only person you are hurting is you. You need to stop.

Have you ever had a friend who swore they were completely fulfilled and happy but had a stank attitude? Or an overweight friend who swore they loved their size but never wanted to go shopping or hated on the things others wore? In most cases its called denial. If you are subscribed to a skewed way of thinking, finding the love that you need will prove difficult.

We are not perfect people. Each of us has flaws and faults but the constant remains that we act how we believe. You are who you are, whether you accept it or not. If you can’t love yourself now, you’ll always be looking for love in others. So let me be blunt, stop it!

Of all the confident people I know, they posses the 5 traits below. Learn to master each, and love will find you.

• Don’t put yourself down or call yourself ugly (positivity)
• Don’t lie to yourself (honesty)
• Don’t let yourself down (trust)
• Don’t let yourself get away with making excuses (responsibility)
• Encourage yourself and speak highly of yourself (support)

Stop pretending that you’re already who you want to be and work on being who you were meant to be. I promise that if you look within yourself for the love you’re trying to find you will actually find it.

Thoughts?