How To Make Your Attention Invaluable
By definition when something is rare or in limited supply it’s seen as incredibly valuable. You can create the same feeling with your attention and you should.
We all want attention.
Since we were babies and crying for milk, attention meant we were being taken care of. Neglected, we could get hurt or feel unsafe. Under a careful eye, with our caretaker giving us their full attention, better yet engaging us we felt loved.
Why should it be any different now when most adults are simply big babies anyway?
So how can you make your attention the must-have item of the spring, summer and beyond?
Make it infrequent. I was asked, ‘If you have a lot of time on your hands is it considered valuable?’ The truth, no. I know singles hate to hear this but being too available is the kiss of death for dating. It’s great that you have so much chemistry with someone that you want to see them 24/7 and vice versa but successful dating requires that you have something else going on for yourself than dating.
You should not rearrange your life to accommodate someone you’ve just met. If you have great chemistry and you like each other, let the courtship run its course. People like to feel like you’ve made time for them not that you have time for them because your life schedule is empty.
Have the qualities singles admire. Some people would take a diamond in a paper bag while others prefer the beauty and thought put into Tiffany’s packaging. The qualities Western society values are attractiveness, intelligence, social importance, wealth (or a lil’ change) and status. The more features you possess, like a brand new cell phone, the more people will want to date you. This creates an excitement about being around you, making your attention seem special because it is very highly desired.
Spread it like a rumor. You might wonder how can your attention seem rare if you give it to everyone? Easily, by giving people just enough to want more. Why do people want to know the full story after hearing a bit of gossip? Because it’s really interesting and they know so little about it. You can generate the same buzz around your attention by giving it as often as possible but only in the slightest dose.
Giving your attention means giving your attention. It doesn’t mean talking someone’s head off, or getting attention. It actually means giving your time, energy, a listening ear and your consideration. Do this and more people want to date you than do now, I guarantee.